New beginning

Sometimes in life, you need to hit the restart button. That's where I am, needing a new beginning. I heard the hymn, "Spirit of the Living God,"  last night and I can resonate with those lyrics. Spirit of the Living God, fall afresh on me. Then I read Revelation 21:5 where he says, "Behold I am making all things new." We know this to mean redemption of the earth and the entire creation, but I feel like this verse was His way of telling me that there is redemption for my first few weeks in Uganda.

I was naive, and perhaps arrogant, to think that starting life here would be easy. It has not been. I have spent the past 3 weeks struggling with health problems on top of other problems. I woke up most mornings with severe itching and hives. One day, I woke up at 3 in the morning with my eye swollen shut. Other times, I would notice my tongue and lips swelling. Then my throat would get a little tighter and I would start to panic. I had no idea what was happening to me and why (from a medical standpoint, from a spiritual standpoint I knew this to be intense spiritual warfare). I am normally healthy and rarely get sick so it was discouraging that I was having allergies here that I had never before. The ICU nurse in me worried  I would end up in anaphylactic shock. But, it could all be treated with Benedryl and I was taking Benedryl like it was ice cream. I was so tired and felt like life was a blur. Then, the vomiting started and wouldn't stop. I was laying on my bathroom floor in complete exhaustion from being so sick, staring at Hebrews 6:19 that I had posted on the wall. He reminded me that He is a trustworthy anchor for our souls, even when your laying on the bathroom floor because you don't have the energy to keep running to the bathroom to throw up. The next day I sent out a Facebook post asking for prayer for my health. The next morning, I felt prompted to look into allergic reactions to Doxycycline. I have taken this medication every time I have come to Uganda for malaria prevention, so I convinced myself that I couldn't be allergic to the medication. Then, I read article after article that perfectly described what I had been going thru for 3 weeks.

I ended up at a clinic. The doctor ran some labs and everything looked ok. He agreed that I should stop taking doxycycline and see what happened. He had me come back a few days later when the medication was out of my system. I am so happy to say that I am back to myself now! I have not had to take Benedryl in 7 days and we determined that I am very allergic to doxycycline.

On top of not feeling well, we have had many cultural lessons to learn. We have failed, miserably at times. Without meaning to, we have done things that are offensive. Americans and Ugandans are different. We think differently. We problem solve differently. We handle stress differently. We handle illness differently. It has been an adjustment to us and to the Ugandans we are living and working with to have two Americans join an all Ugandan staff.  Our differences have created conflict at times and have also led to some sweet times of sitting down and asking for grace and forgiveness. Americans and Ugandans are different, but the God we serve is the same. And we have determined that we can find unity in Him. We have also laughed a lot and learned a lot from each other.

We have had situations occur that don't happen in America. Today, we didn't have water and power for most of the day. Earlier this week, the water was out for an extended amount of time. As an American, I'm sad to say that I barely know how to function without water and power. The rest of the staff are not inconvenienced at all. They remain content and make the needed preparations for a day without water. This afternoon, we got home and turned on the water and I found myself thanking God that I now had the opportunity to shower. I have never thanked God for the opportunity to shower or wash clothes in America, because I really don't remember a time when I have been without water. These new circumstances are frustrating but also humbling. I find myself dependent on Him in ways that I have never had to depend on Him.

On week 2, I found myself questioning whether or not I was going to make it here.  That's exactly what the enemy wants, for me to question and give up. I am thankful for sweet time with the Lord and the reminder that He has called me here. A lot of what I have done here so far has been uncomfortable, but I wouldn't trade it for anything. I dropped a friend off at the airport last night and there wasn't any part of me that wanted to get on a plane and head back to America. He gave me the assurance that this is where I am supposed to be. A friend told me that the greater the measure of opposition prior to a work correlates with the measure of how God intends to work. The enemy has tried so hard to strip me of health, water, power, access to community through internet/phone, and so many other comfort measures. And the great thing about Jesus is that He keeps giving grace and strength to carry on in the midst of it all. And somehow He finds a way to reveal His nearness in it all and you are assured that He loves you and has big plans for you even as you lay on a bathroom floor praying you don't throw up again.

 I am so inspired by what is happening at A Child's Voice and I am thankful to get to be a part of it. The staff here are really doing amazing things and I am excited to be able to share more. I could listen to Freda tell her stories all day and I sit in awe of the things He is accomplishing through her and other staff members. For now, I am focusing on learning the language and learning the culture. I have a lot to learn. Pray for me as I try to learn how to do life here. Pray for the staff of A Child's Voice as we learn how to be a powerful team, united in Christ, who advocates for orphans and vulnerable children. Spirit of the Living God, fall afresh on me.